When I picked up Zeke from school, his teachers said, “Yeah, he’s been like that all day. What’s he doing?”
“You know,” I stammered, “this is new, so I’ll have to decipher it, analyze it and get back to you on that.”
“Hey, Zekey…whatcha doin’, Buddy?”
“Mommy I’m not an elf!”
“OK, Buddy…you’re not an elf. Can you tell me who you are?”
“MOMMY!!! STOP CALLING ME BUDDY, I’M NOT AN ELF!!!”
“OK, Zeke.” My mind does a fast Mommy-kid translation: Buddy + elf = Will Farrell’s character’s name in the movie “ELF”. Wow! I’m getting good at this.
Taking a different approach to the landing pad, “Zekey, are you playing?”
“NO! I’m fighting!”
“Oh, I can see that. Who are you fighting?”
“No one Mommy…I’m just playing.”
“Who’s on first?” I say to the imaginary camera I talk to because I live in a sitcom.
“What’s on second and I don’t know’s on third, Mommy!!!”
“What the…? Nevermind that. Zeke, do you need help putting your shirt on?”
“No thank you.”
“Do you need help taking your shirt off?”
“No thank you, Mommy. I need help making my shirt longer to cover my belly.”
“Of course you do.”
In the mean time, we pick up Nate from his class. He walks out, looks at Zeke and without hesitation says, “Hey, Zane! Wanna join up with the other Ninjas and train with Sensei Wu?”
(sigh) Little-Boy-Speak is a foreign language to me. I hope to be proficient in it before they leave for college.
Now, if you’ll excuse me…I have to sew some fabric onto the bottom of my son’s t-shirt.
No Comments “My Son’s New Phase…Luckily, I Don’t Embarrass Easily.”
You will NEVER understand little boy speak, because once you think you’ve got it – they transform to teenage speak. And THAT you do NOT want to understand. It is scary.
Have fun sewing.
HUGGLES!
I HAD to click over from my email and I’m glad I did. I didn’t get it at all without the photos. Too very cute!
Oh, Dude. I feel you. I don’t speak spinjitsu. It took me months to figure out that there was a “LORD” Garmedon AND a “LLOYD” Garmedon. I thought my kid had just developed a speech impediment.
Holy Moley…I just did a spit-take. My husband JUST said to me last week, “Honey, this is so funny…Zeke thinks LORD Garmedon is LLOYD Garmedon!!” MAN I can’t wait to “Who’s the dummy now?” him.
FWIW, little girls have a language too. 🙂 I take it as a positive thing that my girls can communicate without me. This closeness will serve them well through life. Loved the story… too funny!
How on earth can I ever hope to keep up with our grandchildren if I haven’t a clue what they’re talking about in the first place. Two grandaughters and one grandson to date with another on it’s way at this very moment, with a “mystery” grandchild due 1st June. Oh well, at least I can give them love if nothing else.